Slap & Tickle

Was it Something I said?

There’s this cool new website called Omegle, which is Elgemo spelled backwards. Either way, it doesn’t mean crap—which is pretty much how this site works.

They randomly select you with some random stranger to chat with. Don’t know who they are. Don’t really care. However, the conversations are short—everyone keeps disconnecting from me in mid-converstation.

I’ve had three conversations. The first person brought up puberty in the second sentence (disconnect). The second person couldn’t spell. And then there was this guy:

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hello random stranger
Stranger: good evening
Stranger: how are you doing?
You: good. you?
Stranger: not too bad
Stranger: i ate too much, though
Stranger: feel like i'm about to explode
You: sorry to hear that
You: what time is it where you are?
Stranger: 6:56 pm
You: ah...
Stranger: whats your local time?
You: 3:57
You: California
Stranger: you are in the past, Californian
Stranger: I come from the future
You: No... we're the future!
Stranger: we control weather now.
Stranger: indoors only
Stranger: but China is working on it.
You: We have Schwarzenegger
Stranger: You deserve a big chocolate chip cookie if you spelled his name correctly
You: Once you've got The Terminator, you've pretty much control whatever you want
You: Mmmmm... cookies!
Stranger: except the state budget
You: Yeah... we're screwed.
Stranger: Terminator can't control that
You: try as he might
Stranger: seriously. I blame the cool tourism ad
You: So... what did you eat that made you SO stuffed?
You: (I kind of dig that ad).
You: (Yeah... we say "dig" here... "groovy", too)
Stranger: yes, its full of awesome sauce. but seriously, was it a justifiable expense?
Stranger: I ate a burger
You: No, it'll probably make people want to move here vs. visit.
Stranger: and some chips with spinach dip
You: Homemade? Did you BBQ?
Stranger: and now I feel like I'll have a problem walking through doorways
Stranger: si senhor
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Yes… it all makes perfect sense, doesn’t it?