Slap & Tickle

Robert Blake has been arrested… I think the Hollywood curse that people always talk about happened to The Little Rascals. None of those got anywhere without some horrific tragedy.

Most went broke, Alfalfa died after being shot in his bar, Darla committed suicide when she could no longer find work, Buckwheat died of a heart attack at age 49, Jackie Coopers’ parents spent all of his money… and the list goes on.

These poor kids. While they may have enjoyed a unique childhood, no one ever prepared them for the realities of adulthood. They were given so much as kids, nothing in life could measure up. They peaked by age 5… how can you compete with that?

Rarely does a child actor make that move from child to adult star. Jodi Foster did it. Michael J. Fox did it. But for every Jodi and Michael there is a Dana Plato and a Macaulay Culkin… and a Annison Jones (Buffy, Family Affair)… and the cast of both Diff’rent Strokes and The Facts of Life. Oh, it goes on and on and on… and on.

I feel bad for these kids… the fact that they are forgotten. Mostly, I feel bad because I really don’t care. It’s not their fault their lives are not as wonderful as their initial promise, but neither are most people’s. It’s just that the former child stars have something to compare it to.

Life’s a bitch. It’s nothing new.

My gosh I’m awfully cynical, aren’t I? As a duly registered minister I should come up with some sort of helpful bit of advice… Note that I did not say I would come up with some helpful advice, I only acknowledged that I should come up with some helpful advice. Good advice is hard to get—and even harder to give. Just look at Ann Landers. The woman speaks to millions but continues to F’-up every chance she gets. It’s downright embarrassing.

Maybe I should advise her?

Let’s move on to other issues, shall we? The weekend is here at last! Thank God (remember, I’m allowed to say that). I was hoping to go to a Stanford Baseball game on Saturday—but their in Seattle, so maybe I’ll go for a walk to Lexington Reservoir. It’s a good long walk and the view is wonderful (by “view” I mean hot-looking guys). A buddy and I will be heading up to the Lonestar Saloon on Saturday—I’m hoping to see JD and make up for not being polite last week, but I’m not counting on it. As Shawn said, “There’s a difference in him liking you now and liking you right now.” The truth hurts, Shawny-baby. Thankyousoverymuch for pointing that out to an already insecure individual.

Sunday is Scott MC’s birthday brunch and we have a group of nine showing up, which is pretty good considering it was last minute and no one in our group ever wants to RSVP for something.

All in all, I’m hoping for a relaxing weekend… but with my luck it will be nothing but chaos and hookers, chaos and hookers. You realize that is just wishful thinking, right?

Have a good one!
--cml