Gentlemen, You May Thank Me with Twenties & Fifties

CNN Health is reporting that “Fellatio May Significantly Decrease the Risk of Breast Cancer in Women”. Merry Christmas!

“But, Honey… I’m only thinking of you and your health…”

Sorry, ladies...

CORRECTION: A bunch of fun-killers have noted that this is a fake news story. Which amuses me even more because I pulled it from the Google News page. Man, was I sucked in by this (no pun intended). Next you're going to tell me that those penis growing pills don't work...

Healthy Living

In today's New York Times, wellness columnist Tara Parker explains why your ability to do a push-up is linked to how well you age. According to the calculator, not only am I unfit, but I've been dead for three years, but just didn't know it.

I could do 27 push-ups... I just choose not to do them... because I can't.

By the way, Jack LaLanne is 93 years old and can still do finger push-ups. Friggin' show off...!